Even If
If this be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of your hand, O king. 18 But even if not, be it known to you, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the golden image that you have set up.” Daniel 3:17-18
I knew she was the one, the love of my life. Paula and I had been dating for several months, and we knew the moment when I would ask her to marry me was coming soon. In fact, we even had our own private code word – ‘soon.’ It was a Monday night, September 8, 1980. The Dallas Cowboys were playing the Washington Redskins in a season-opening battle of division rivals. I had bought the engagement ring and planned to ask her at halftime. We were at her house, and her dad and I were watching the game. Paula was sitting beside me, and right before halftime, she went to her room, put curlers in her hair, then came back to the sofa. As the half ended, I asked her to sit on the front porch, and I asked her to marry me. She said yes! Curlers and all. Then came the hard part: I had to ask her dad. He seemed OK with giving her away! After the game (the Cowboys won 17-3), I gave her the ring. What a great night.
We knew that we wanted a family and that God would bless us with kids. We dreamed of sitting on a porch, watching a yard full of kids, grandkids, and great-grandkids, while we rocked in rocking chairs. We would pucker our lips and kiss like old grandparents with no teeth (not sure why we didn’t at least have dentures). It was a beautiful dream. But then came the news that sank our hearts. Paula’s doctor said it was unlikely she could get pregnant. This made no sense; our wedding day was fast approaching, and we knew God had promised us a family. Or was that just our dream, and God had other plans?
Sometimes in life, we see things as we want them to be and forget that God is in control and that His plans are the best for us and, more importantly, for His Kingdom. So, what did we do? We prayed and turned our dreams over to our Lord. We committed to following His will, and if His plan for us was to have kids, we would always understand that they would be His, and we would have the tremendous blessing of raising them. But even if not, we would still honor Him, follow Him, and trust Him.
Paula and I were married on August 29, 1981. We never gave up on our dream of having kids, but for the first couple of years of our marriage, it seemed like it would not happen. But on a chilly night in January of 1984, Paula knew something was wrong. We went to the hospital to discover she was pregnant, but we lost the baby that night. What was happening? Were we not being faithful enough? We wanted children so badly that we had dedicated them to the Lord before they were even conceived, so why this heartbreak? We had been faithful, believing He would give us children, but we thought we were prepared even if He did not. I will admit, as a man, I did not really grasp what was happening, but I know my love silently grieved in a way I could never understand.
————————————————————————-
Nebuchadnezzar, the king of Babylon, ordered the creation of a golden statue made in his image and commanded everyone in the nation to bow down and worship at the ceremony. Anyone who refused would be thrown into the fiery furnace. Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, who were Jewish and loyal to the God of Israel, refused to obey. The king was furious and ordered the three men to be brought before him. Even in his anger, he offered Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego one more chance to bow before his idol. Then he said, “If you do not, you will immediately be thrown into a blazing furnace. Do you think there is any god who can save you”? The men immediately replied, “O Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you. 17 If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God whom we serve is able to save us. He will rescue us from your power, Your Majesty. 18 But even if he doesn’t, we want to make it clear to you, Your Majesty, that we will never serve your gods or worship the gold statue you have set up.”
The Bible says Nebuchadnezzar was so filled with rage that his face became distorted. He demanded the furnace be turned up seven times hotter, so hot that the servants who threw them in died instantly. Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, tied and fully clothed, fell into the furnace. But as the king watched, he saw these faithful men walking around, but someone else was with them! He knew the fourth person was a divine being, and he knew that being was the Most High God. The three men were removed from the furnace and brought before the king. Their clothes and hair were not singed, and the ropes were gone.
Nebuchadnezzar answered and said, “Blessed be the God of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, who has sent his angel and delivered his servants, who trusted in him, and set aside one of the king’s command, and yielded up their bodies rather than serve and worship any god except their own God. 29 Therefore I make a decree: Any people, nation, or language that speaks anything against the God of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego shall be torn limb from limb, and their houses laid in ruins, for there is no other god who is able to rescue in this way.”
30 Then the king promoted Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego in the province of Babylon.
Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego were willing to risk death rather than compromise their faith and bow down to a false idol. They displayed amazing faith and trust in God’s power to save them, showing great courage in the face of adversity and persecution. Yet the thing that stands out to me is the statement, “But even if not….” They understood that they really did not know what God’s plan for them was. They were not flattering God or bargaining with Him; they were expressing their faith regardless of the consequences. If God saved them from the fire, they would rejoice and continue to live for Him. If they died? God would take them home with Him, never to suffer again.
Hebrews chapter 11 is sometimes called the ‘roll call of faith’. The passage lists people of God who faithfully served God, many of whom faced similar trials and persecution, such as Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. God rescued some, but He did not rescue others. The New Testament tells us of God rescuing Peter and Paul, but we are also told that James was beheaded and Stephen was stoned to death. Did they lack faith? Of course not! They simply understood “even if not,” and they remained faithful to the end. Jim Eliot and his ministry partners, Ed McCully, Roger Youderian, Pete Flemming, and Nate Saint, died on January 8, 1956; all died when attacked by the native tribe to whom they had come to share the gospel. Eliot wrote these words in his journal just before he died: “He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep, to gain what he cannot lose.”
Eliot understood the priority of emphasizing the eternal over the temporal. The importance of living life with the end in mind, to finish strong and leave an enduring legacy of love, faithfulness, and kindness. To realize our life’s purpose is to be used by God to shine His light on this earth during our brief time here. We can spend our lives pursuing treasures and power on earth, but these things will all pass away. All these men of faith showed they understood that they would eventually lose all things of this earth, but their faith gave them the one thing they could never lose – heaven and eternal life.
I try my best to live with this attitude, and I know how blessed I am. I have an amazing, faithful, and loving wife, three productive, faithful kids, and nine awesome grandkids. I have a beautiful home, a little money in the bank, and a ministry that I love to serve. I have good health, great friends, a wonderful community to live in, and the freedom to worship and serve at a church I love. The Rangers even won a World Series. I want to hold on to all these things with an iron grip, but I know all these things will pass away, and someday, on God’s timing, I must let them go. By faith, I know God will hold all things together for those He loves, but if I understand and trust His will, sometimes I must say, “but even if not.”
Prayer
Thank you, Father, for all you have given me and provided for me. I pray for a faith like Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, who understood that life is temporary, so I must live for You each day and be willing to lose what I cannot keep. But Hallelujah! I have the one thing I cannot lose – You, the Eternal Father who saved me and will keep me forever. And I pray that all my family can see this faith in me and live with it. Amen
On December 14, 1984, God provided a miracle when our son, Brent, was born. Then just seventeen months later, on May 23, 1986, our daughter, Amanda, was born. We lost three more beautiful children in 1988, 1990, and 1996, but on June 13, 1994, Taylor was born! God worked miracles all seven times, even though He immediately took four of them home. And one day, all nine of us will celebrate together as the family God provided for us, even if it was not the way we planned.
Brent, Amanda, and Taylor. I love you so much. You are truly miracles, and I am so proud of each of you. I remember the moment I held each of you in my arms, and the first time you held your miracles in yours. Thank you, Jenny, Dustin, and Nicole, for loving our kids. I am so glad God brought you into our family.
Kaitlyn, Landon, Caden, Caleb, Jaxon, Avery, Ryan, Luka, Noah. I love you so much. Each of you is amazing, and I am so proud to be your G-Daddy.
To the love of my life. Thank you for the strength and faith you live each day. I wish I had been better at understanding your pain and been more encouraging as you grieved. Thank you for being an amazing, faithful wife and a fantastic Naina. God has given us so much, and even when He took away, we knew He was walking with us through the ‘fire.’
Crystal LeighAnn (1984), Brad Lee (1988), Chad Scott (1990), and Kaye Gale (1996), love you, and we will see you ‘soon’.
“He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep, to gain what he cannot lose.” Jim Eliot
4/2025
